Since young, you have probably been told what you need to do in order to live a happy and fulfilling life.
Your parents (or parental figures) would tell you that you might need to study hard, get a job at a reputable company and save a lot of money, then you’ll be happy and fulfilled at the end of your life.
Your teachers would also tell you to study hard, get into the ‘right’ college or university and then the right job opportunities will come to you – then you’ll be happy and fulfilled because you have security.
Even your peers or work colleagues will indirectly influence you about what you need to do in order to be happy and fulfilled – to attain the dream of ‘work-life balance’?
But more than often, you’ll see people who are burnt out and at the maximum limits that their stress can handle.
They wind up working their fingers to the bone and they wonder why they aren’t happy… that the idea of ‘balance’ seems so far away.
So in real life, it would be like, finally paying attention to the kids when they kids don’t even recognize their own dad…
Or finally seeking a holistic treatment when they have been relying on energy drinks and caffeine to survive in their career…
Or finally learning how to manage their finances when they have been too busy on everything else.
It’s like they are playing a ‘garbage can’ game where they have 6 cans and only 4 lids – they keep on switching the lids to cover a different can when one starts to stink.
I’m sure you don’t want that, but more than often, we become oblivious to our neglected areas of our lives because we don’t know the true meaning of balance.
So what does it really take to attain this so-called work-life balance?
What are the parameters for successfully attaining it?
It all starts by being crystal clear on what you want to achieve in every area for your life.
Clarity is the key towards getting there. Clarity helps us channel all the thoughts in our mind to a singular focus.
Because our thoughts have the power to transform our reality. When you have a crystal clear image on what you really want in life, then you have the ability to live by design rather than by default. (In order words, you can direct your life rather than let life happen to you.)
There are 12 areas in life and in these 12 areas are pillars that support one another to create that ideal balance:
- Health and fitness
- Our conscious and subconscious mind programming
- Emotional memory
- Our energy field
- Financial health
- Our social circles
- Intimate relationships
- Values we pass to our children
- Our recreations
- The life vision for our future
Whether we realize it or not, when one area is out of balance, it affects the entire structure which is our life.
In fact, trying to compensate one are to make up for another isn’t a wise choice.
After all, you don’t want to become the successful CEO who went through 4 divorces and their kids barely recognize them…
Or the health fanatic who doesn’t know how to think for himself…
Or the kind, friendly neighborhood ‘saint’ who helps everyone but can barely feed herself…
Or the rich jerk who doesn’t have any real friends or strength of character…
The following paragraphs serves as an exercise in clarity to help you to be clear on all these areas and help you to have a new perspective on how you can live by design in each of these areas:
1) Health And Fitness
Health is the primary pillar of our lives. Without health, you simply can’t enjoy anything else. It doesn’t matter if you have money or friends around you, you simply can’t enjoy them to it’s maximum capacity. When your body is at optimal health, you will be able to think clearer and function more effectively at work or at play. Longevity will play a key part for you to live your mission and purpose for this life. There is this saying that people would trade their health for wealth when they are young, and they will trade their wealth for their health when they are old. There shouldn’t be any trades if you are willing to invest in your health by eating consciously, keeping your stress levels low, exercising only a few minutes a day and sleeping enough hours.
2) Conscious And Subconscious Mind Programming
Our minds are split between our conscious mind and subconscious mind. Experts say that we use only 4% of our conscious mind and the rest are stored in our subconscious mind which is around 96%. The subconscious mind is so powerful, that whatever we think with our thoughts, are stored in our infinitely huge memory banks that forms our beliefs and ideas over the long run. With that said, what you put in your mind is of the utmost importance. Are you feeding your mind with growth oriented materials that will help you to have a positive mindset and teach you useful skills or are you flooding your mind with negativity and news from the media which is designed to divide people. Can you think of 5 helpful books that will fill you with positive thoughts?
3) Emotional Memory
Being happy no matter what your circumstances are is very important. People who are unhappy are constantly stressed out, directly or indirectly make others miserable and are oblivious to the many joys they can experience around them (It’s like going hungry when you are at a buffet of joy).Ask yourself, how many percent of the day are you experiencing happy emotions? It’s all about the story you tell yourself. Did you know that emotions have memory banks? Your heart is like one huge organ. That is where emotional memories are stored. Our thoughts about our past is stored within our emotional memory, therefore the emotions you felt about yesterday, or last year or 30 years ago are all the same as though you are feeling it right in the now. When you can change your story about what you believed has happened in the past, it will change the present way you feel about it.
4) Our Energy Field (or our spirit)
Some people might call this the inner self, the superconscious mind, the spirit or the soul. Combined with our emotional memory and our minds, this is the largest energy field that we have where some experts call the superconscious or our life force, chi or soul, it stores even more energy about how we feel about everything on a very, very deep level. Your beliefs are stored in your energy field. That is why when we meet someone new, we can feel very comfortable around them or uncomfortable around them even though we barely know them. We can read other people’s energy field and it will determine our thoughts. Your spiritual potential is based on how well you practice any religious or spiritual exercise. Are you working on your ego? Do you meditate regularly? Do you sense a profound gratitude towards all there is in life? Are you connected with all there is?
5) Our Character
The strength of a man or a woman is in our character. Character traits like kindness, compassion, strength, equanimity, calmness, discipline and many more are important for us to live an effective life. Characters are formed by our daily habits. Our daily habits are the results of what we think about our lives. If you can change your thoughts, you can change your daily habits which will eventually change your character and change your destiny. You can change your character – you just need to start with your thoughts. There’s this saying that goes: “Watch your thoughts; for they become words. Watch your words; for they become actions. Watch your actions; for they become habits. Watch your habits; for they become character. Watch your character for it will become your destiny.”
6) Financial Health
There are many who think that money is the root of all evil so they renounce money and live a miserable life. There are others who only think about money so they neglect every other area of life. What you think about money will determine how much money you have and your reality towards it. If you want to have more money but you have a negative belief about money, for example, “Rich people are greedy and I don’t want to be greedy.” It is like wanting to be part of the elite club but hating the people in it. It is an incongruent thought – when you are able to align your beliefs about money, then you can have a breakthrough in your financial life. At the end of the day, money is just a tool – a resource. It’s more convenient to have more resources so ask yourself how money can serve you rather than being a servant to money.
7) Social Circles
A research was done and it shows that people tend to live longer when they are surrounded by people they can enjoy good company with. Think about who the people are in your life. What you think about yourself and your friends determine the kind of friends you have in your life. Some people can blame their friends for not being good to them, but that is because their thoughts betray them. They don’t believe they deserve better friends and that is why they don’t have good quality friends. Once again it all goes back to your thoughts about your social life… are they serving you or pulling you down?
8) Our Intimate Relationships
It is always good to share our lives with a significant other. Sometimes, we may have a partner that is fully supportive about what we do. Sometimes, some partners inevitably pull us down. It all depends on what our thoughts on love are. So what do you think about love and what is it’s significance? Basically everything – whatever we find attractive in our mate is all based on our beliefs about what love is. To be successful in love and romance, be very clear what your thoughts and values about what love is.
9) What Values Pass On To Our Children
Children can be a joy to you if it is a priority in your life. Raising them is not just about watching them grow up but planting the seeds of your legacy. If you don’t have a good legacy to leave behind, then your children will be growing up by default and not by your ‘design’. For example, it is not what you say, but what you think. Children can pick up your energy field. When you do something and tell them another, they won’t listen because your thoughts are picked up by your children. What you think is profound and it will affect how your children will be for their future.
Nowadays, careers are not just there for you to earn money but it is a venue for creative self expression of value in exchange for satisfactory compensation. If you think that your work is boring and a drudgery, it will show in your work. Learn to reframe a new reality about your career and enjoy your work – you will have better performance and better rewards. The Japanese principle of Ikigai talks about: Doing what you love, doing what you are good at, doing what the world needs and doing what can get paid very well. Find the flow with these 4 principles and you won’t feel like you are working even for a day because you’re having so much fun.
11) Our Recreations
Work hard and play hard. Some play too much, while others play too little. Are you proud of what you play with? Did you know that having fun in your life will make the other areas in your life more fun? What you think about your play time is very important – do not underestimate the power of play in your life. In fact, integrate with all the other areas of your life and you will start to improve your thoughts. Everything is interconnected. Loosen up, have a bit of fun and see how it will transform your day to day life.
12) Crafting Our Futures
When you are crystal clear with every area of your life, then you will have a solid foundation to craft your future.
What we experience every single day in all the other areas set the trajectory for the future with our thoughts.
It becomes an inevitable process and when done right, it will turn your life into a living masterpiece.
You’ll truly be able to design your own unique life path and no longer living by default.
Our thoughts are the key towards living a phenomenal life. Craft your ideal life with the most powerful force in the universe today!
Each of the 12 areas of your life is inseparably interconnected.
By focusing all your thoughts into one congruent and aligned direction, you will be surprised at what you can create for your life.